There’s Only One Way to be a Beer Snob and You’re Doing It Wrong!

This is the kind of bad attitude I'm talking about! But we could...

This is the kind of bad attitude I’m talking about! But we could…

My husband and I, who both consider ourselves solid beer snobs, took a trip to beer Mecca last year: Vermont. We had a very tightly packed vacation schedule, which looked something like this:
To Do & See
1) Beer

While in Burlington, we took a beer tour of the city, visiting at least four breweries that I remember. Somewhere after the third beer the other couple on our tour invited us to come with them later that night to visit the brewery that makes Beer Advocate’s top rated beer: Heady Topper, an imperial IPA from The Alchemist. They are located in Waterbury, Vermont, a bit of a drive from Burlington. When Ben and I both admitted we’d never had the beer, the woman let out a somewhat inappropriate moan as her eyes rolled back in her head.

Numero Uno

Numero Un

While she recovered her husband let loose a long string of superlatives to describe The Alchemist’s beers that gradually took on a British air. “Oh dear,” he fussed. “My accent comes out when I’ve been drinking!” Ben asked if he was from England, to which he answered, “no, but my grandfather was born there.”

The further into the tour we went the less either of us wanted to be stuck for hours with these people in a confined space. They epitomized every stereotype of beer snobbery that I hope dearly I do not myself embody. They breathlessly turned red in the face telling me everything they knew about any beery topic at hand. They started many of their responses to me with, “Well, actually…”. They snubbed certain beers and breweries that did not somehow live up to their vertiginous standards. (Except Magic Hat? Posers.) Continue reading

Freedom & Unity: All for Beer and Beer for All!

This is how Vermont starts a beer tour

The first Vermonter I met on our week-long stay in the Green Mountains was a red-faced middle-aged man in pajama pants, Birkenstocks with socks, and a lilac LL Bean fleece vest. “All right! Here we go! How you doin’? Great! Let’s go!” he shouted as he clapped his hands and bounded into the convenience store. A toxic cloud of alcohol breathed along behind him. I ducked down in the refrigerated aisle, debating which of the dozen or so Vermont-made beers there to try first.

Vermont does small up big. Next to my home state of Ohio, it’s really a puny place, but they lead the country in breweries per capita. Many of the breweries and brew pubs are small and don’t distribute widely. Big is not always better, and this is something that Vermonters completely understand. Sustainable, local, green, independent business practices are the standard here. These seem to be in the citizenry’s very attitude toward living in the state, which fosters the perfect atmosphere for small breweries.

A Burlington sunset over Lake Champlain

One might argue that this local pride and self confidence stems from the Revolutionary War. Ben and I are staying in the Green Mountains in the northern end of the state, right around where Ethan Allen and the Green Mountain Boys terrorized British authorities and scared surveyors from the land. The sentiment being, as far as I can judge, “The hell you’re going to take my land.” After seeing these hills in an autumn sunset, I can see why you would fight so viciously for them. Continue reading